Working mom?

>> Tuesday, July 6, 2010

I have started looking for a job.

Before I had kids, I couldn't imagine leaving them to go to work until they were in school. I thought it would be incredibly difficult and not something at all that I wanted to do. When my Sweet Baboo was born, I thought I'd stay home until he was three. As the first year went by, I thought, maybe two. Not that I wanted to leave him, but I worked hard for my degree and I don't want it to become obselete because I got it, then stayed home for several years, thus not keeping up to date in my field. My son turns one in less than two weeks, and I am looking for a job.

The main reason for this is the economy. I may not want to go back to work for another year, but if I start looking in a year, it could be another year, or even two, before I find anything. That would just be no good. The idea that I could be back in the workforce, with my kid in day care in a matter of weeks terrifies and exhilirates me. I love my kid (as all moms do), but honestly, I'm getting bored. I really think he could use more interaction than a few play groups can provide, and I could use some adult friends to spend my days with.

Also, I'm not going to lie to you, I am so over being poor. So over it. I am so over living across the hall from the Trashertons: A woman, her ex husband, her current boyfriend, and their assortment of children. You can just imagine the drama that emanates from that apartment. I don't want to deal with it, and I don't want my son to have to deal with it as he gets more aware. I am over this neighbourhood. I'm over the gang signs everywhere, being afraid when The Hubbs has a late class, the fact that none of the schools around here have playgrounds and there are signs on power poles advertising support groups for prostitutes. Over it. So over it. If we end up living here when Baboo starts school, I don't know what I will do. We need to get out of this school district and away from these people.

I want to move. We can't afford that unless I get a job. I don't need a big house, expensive cars, a designer wardrobe, or any of that. But I would like a house. Any house. Preferably in a neighbourhood that gangs haven't claimed and where I can walk down the street with my camera around my neck without fear of getting mugged. I'd like to live in a neighbourhood where I can take my son to a school playground that is more than just a plot of grass and a slab of pavement littered with broken glass.

I want my family to be safe, happy, and at peace. I'm aware that it might take a long time to find a job. Just the thought of how long some of my acquaintances have been looking for work almost makes me want to admit defeat before I even get started. It's funny how anxious just the act of sending out resumes and writing cover letters makes me. It's almost as if I've already forgotten that my goal is to have a job somewhere between now and a year from now, that it's not an absolute emergency. I just need to chill. Chill and have faith. It will all work out.

It always does.

4 comments:

Prenda Le Stelle July 7, 2010 at 5:48 PM  

You have received an award! :)
http://prendalestelle.blogspot.com/2010/07/you-like-me-you-really-like-me.html

<3
Jillian

D July 13, 2010 at 6:34 AM  

So what kind of job are looking for?

Tamara July 21, 2010 at 9:29 AM  

Good luck with your job search, I hope you find something great. I'm sorry your not happy with your current living situation, it doesn't seem ideal so hopefully now that the wheels are in motion you can start thinking about where and when you want to move and start working towards that goal.

The Psycho Mama July 28, 2010 at 2:19 PM  

Thanks for the well-wishes ladies! I'm looking for something in a helping profession. I've applied at Montessori schools, community centres, group homes, employment agencies, school boards and college guidance offices.

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